Loving the Journey is a Bunch of Shit

Warning: Fat girl bitchings ahead.

Weight loss as a journey, not a destination is such a frustrating thing. I understand the validity of the sentiment: for durable health and wellness, crash dieting/starvation/juicing is not a solution for long-term health. To change your weight, you really have to change your life.

But I haaaaate that. I want a magic pill! I want to take a supplement that will fix everything! Portion control, “clean eating”, learning new habits is such a fucking drag.

I went off the wagon, so to speak, for a few months. I just wasn’t focused on eating well, and when I’m not focused on eating well I eat extremely poorly. I’m characteristically immoderate. I gained back ~20 pounds that I had lost, which is super super fucking frustrating. Sure, I didn’t gain it *all* back, which is good, but goddamn it’s such a blow. Gaining weight is such an easy thing. Losing weight, especially weight you’ve already fucking lost fucking sucks.

But I’m back on the wagon, as of the last four days. And I’ve actually started this new thing where I’m keeping a visual food log, and so far I actually kind of love it. I also started a new Instagram to track my progress: KateLosesWeight89

My little food logs are so fun, and I’m actually excited to log instead of feeling like it’s a huge drag. Hopefully I stick with it. I think it being a public thing, in addition to being kinda fun and cutesy, fits my personality pretty well!

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Hopefully I’ll stick with it. I need to find accountability partners, and work through feeling discouraged that the scale hasn’t changed after only 4 days. I’m not sure why that bothers me so much, but it absolutely does. I guess I really need to actively focus on enjoying the journey, not the destination.

Start weight: 415

Current weight: 364