44.6 pounds down and hella lessons learned

So I was doing well on Whole 30 for a while, but my heart wasn’t really in it. I would start and stop and start and stop and fuck up and start and stop again. Whole 30 is tough because your body takes a while, WEEKS, to acclimate. I would go for 5 days and go off it, go again for 6 days and go off of it. And the thing I’ve noticed about Whole 30 is you end up eating a lot of calories in those first few days in order to compensate for the carb flu you’re experiencing, meaning I felt like I was gaining weight in those initial stages which is frustrating when you’re depriving yourself of delicious holiday treats and still seeing the opposite of positive results. Whatever, everything sucks.

I’ve decided to take a Whole 30 break for a bit. Not only am I sick, my roommate’s dog died, and 2016 is just generally fucky, I decided I want to focus more on:

  • Tracking what I eat. Everything. I hate doing it, but I know it’s one of those most effective ways to lose weight. Did I mention I fucking hate it though? I think it’s because I’m forced to actually see how many calories I’m ingesting, and that’s just a fucking bummer.
  • Eating LESS. Holy fucking shit I eat a lot. And I read something recently that said something to the effect of “all diets are just trying to help you do one thing: stay satiated while eating less”. I’ve been thinking about that a lot, and it kinda blew my mind. Because it’s true. At the end of the day, keto, Whole 30, Atkins, paleo, etc. are all just trying to get your fat ass to eat less. These diets are successful because you are (theoretically) going to be less hungry after eating 500 calories of fat/protein versus 500 calories of carbs which will cause you to eat less overall. But I guess at the end of the day, CICO (calories in, calories out) is, like, science or something? MIND BLOWN. My mind wants to believe in the magical power of diets but it’s all capitalist smoke and mirrors.
  • Working out. Even a little bit. Even a tiny small amount. My roommate and I have been going to the gym, which is cool. But my poor joints ache and I’m weak af and blah blah blah excuses, but the point is to go and keep going and stop not going.

My goal for 2017 is to lose 100 pounds. I’m still currently FAT-HUNDRED pounds so that should be hella doable. Especially as I’m slowly learning all of these super basic, baby-level lessons about moderation and not treating myself like a food dumpster.

Start weight: 415.0+

Current weight: 370.38

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