I’ve been wanting to start a weight loss blog for a while because it’s the perfect intersection of my two favorite things: writing and bitching about losing weight! I really want to have a place to vent, share what I’m learning, track progress (or failure), and ultimately connect with a blogging community aimed at losing weight.
I’d like to introduce myself, and I figure the best way to do that is to interview myself.
Who are you?
I’m a 27-year-old Alaskan resident named Kate. I have a super cool dog named Moo and I enjoy reading, writing, and my burgeoning stand-up comedy hobby.
Why are you starting this blog?
Because I recently went to the doctor and my weight was 414.8 pounds. Over 400 fucking pounds! I realize I need to change my life or I’m going to die of a heart attack in like 12 minutes.
Dude, that’s really fat. How did you get that fat? Seriously.
Good question! A combination of eating food and eating more food.
But didn’t you realize how fat you were getting?
Hmm, you’re kind of a rude interviewer.
Yeah, I’m not getting paid for this.
I can see that. To answer your question, I did realize how fat I was getting. But that didn’t stop me. Kinda like how the meth addict keeps losing teeth and they’re like, ‘that sucks, better console myself with more meth.’
Did you just compare your love of lemon pound cake to a meth addict? That’s pretty insensitive.
Is it really that different though? Like, addiction is addiction, man. Both substances can kill, right? Okay, fine, meth and food are different. But this is a weight loss blog, not a meth loss blog.
I see why you’re calling this blog “Fat Bitch”. Because you’re kind of a bitch.
Yeah, it’s pretty literal. But my plan is to lose SO. MUCH. WEIGHT. that the blog name is ironic instead of just literal.
Fuck you! This interview is over.
Starting weight: 414.8
Current weight: 398